Werewolf of Oz Bramble Bay Final Twist

All great things must come to an end, and the satirical comedy of Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps is no different. Yes, this is the penultimate chapter/episode of what should by now be your favourite werewolf rambles around Australia to a Wizard of Oz theme travel quest.

The Final Twist 

The Terminator T-800. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

With the main story denouement seemingly over, you might have forgotten about the commotion out at sea that only Grey could see, as it didn’t feature in the bombastic Battle of Bri’s bane.

Yes, like many a great book and film, usually when the baddie is not quite finished, there’s one final twist just as everything seems to be concluded and peaceful.

Chapter 141.  Solo Traveller Once Again, Like When it all Began

So my epic journey had really ended, and all was well. The Great Dame of Oz left to go on a world tour, so Angry, Elle and Cathy were going to stay in the mansion indefinitely. I’m sure they had bright Emerald futures ahead of them; now they had regained their body, mind and spirit confidence.

Once More unto the Sea 

Bramble Bay Sunset-_2= (Photo credit: Sheba_Also)

I knew I could return to the Greenygrey world now, but felt there was something else I needed to do. I thought I should visit the Tasman Sea one last time.

So I said cheerio to everybody and everything in Emerald. There were especially long farewells with my three long-term travel companions and my favourite Oz hat couple. Then it was time to go solo once more; returning to my status upon arrival in Oz.

I shapeshifted into a bird of paradise,
and set off once more for the seaside.
I flew with the wind to the east,
for an hour and a half at least,
arriving at the sea over Deception Bay,
I thought there must be another way,
so I headed south and landed next to a jay,
in a place I liked the sound of: Bramble Bay.
I asked the jay, whose name was Jay,
whether it had seen anything untoward astray.
Jay said nothing unusual had happened all day.

Seeing a Sea Commotion 

The Jays are back in my garden! (Photo credit: Ian A Kirk.)

Everything did seem absolutely normal, and I began to wonder if I’d wasted my time making this diversion. But then:
I saw a commotion out at sea
and wondered what it might be.

The commotion was not only there; it was approaching the beach at a phenomenal speed. I asked Jay if it could see it. It said yes, it could.

I wondered what it could be: Was it more acid-rain? Could it be the MoMo East returning from the deep? Or was it Smiggin Holes escaped from its deep hole? Was there one more test I had to put my exhausted bird-brain through?

Aurora Australis Over Tasman Sea (Photo credit: NASA’s Marshall Space Flight Center)

The commotion reached the shallows. I could now make out a head and arms. I thought I recognised who it was… but surely it couldn’t be… could it?

It continued swimming to the shallows, and then emerged onto the beach.

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Notes

Deception Bay and Bramble Bay are real places.

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Werewolf of Oz Body, Spirit and Mind

The body, mind and spirit of the Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps reacted quickly to the disappointment of the Grand Dame in the last episode, and in today’s third from last chapter in the book, they receive confirmation that they do not need any additional help: they already have the qualities they feel they lack.

Body, Mind and Spirit 

Raining Again (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

At the end of the Wizard of Oz, the scatty Scarecrow receives a diploma after searching for a brain, the cowardly Lion gets a medal for courage and the Tin Man has a pocket watch after looking for a heart.

In this episode of the Werewolf of Oz Elle, Angry and Cathy are told by the Good Witch of the story, Mildly Monotheistic Moby, that they have restored all the body, mind and spirit they’ll need.

The Greenygrey world had been taken over by the Grand Council at the start of the book, but had been liberated by the end, and this is referred to at the end of this chapter/episode. The ending of this episode also throws a cat among the pigeons; or hat among the Werewolf of Ozzers in this case.

Chapter 140.  Moby tells it as it is, Which is…

We were about to leave, when a porcelain pod came around the corner, and MiMo Moby emerged from it. We were ecstatic, and greeted him with gusto; he seemed equally pleased to see us.

Beautiful (Moby song) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I told him the Dame had been a disappointment, so Angry, Cathy and Elle were uncertain of their future in Oz, and I didn’t know if I could return to the Greenygrey world.

Moby Pep Talk

MiMo looked at us all, and then back at Elle, before saying, ‘Why, Elle had body issues when she joined you; she had lost all her strength. But she has been using her body with great dexterity throughout the Ozyssey, and now has her confidence back.’

I had to agree. Elle leapt into the air with joy.

Travel iron (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

‘And Angry was letting the Neighbours’ opinions of his mind get to him; making him feel inadequate. But he has been using fantastic judgement all through the epic adventure, and working well within your travel team.’

Once more, I had to agree. Angry sang a celebratory tune he spontaneously created.

‘And Cathy was in low spirits when you met; but freedom, movement, natural space, friendship, being valued and success have helped lift her spirits since joining your epic adventure; and also raised yours at crucial times in this rousing ramble.’

porcelain heart (Photo credit: opethpainter)

Yet again, I had to agree. Cathy saluted the sun.

‘And you, Grey, you have reached your destination, and helped bring the hats of hope home to Emerald. Deep down you know you have the power to return to Green whenever you want. The Greenygrey world is free again; as free as Emerald.’

I thanked MiMo Moby for everything, and we all said hearty farewells before he disappeared around the corner in his porcelain pod. Not long after, Brian arrived from the same direction.

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Werewolf of Oz Reaches its Emerald Wizard

In the second Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps episode of the week the satirical comedy travel questers finally reach the end of the dust sandy path, barely three episodes before the end.

Yellow Brick Road to the Emerald City  

Cover via Amazon

As the Wizard of Ozzers followed the Yellow Brick Road to the Emerald City, the Werewolf of Ozzers reach the real Australian town of Emerald, Queensland at the end of the Dust Sandy Path.

And as the Wizard turned out to be a bit of a disappointing fake in the Wizard of Oz, there’s disappointment for the Werewolf of Ozzers when they meet the Great Dame of Oz.

However, as in the Wizard of Oz where the Wizard of Ozzers are told they don’t need the help of a wizard; as they already have the qualities they feel lacking; in the Werewolf of Oz the body, mind and spirit  soon recover. Enjoy chapter 139 of 142…

139.  Barry Humphries’s Grumpies 

The Wizard of Oz as pictured in The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

After it settled down in Emerald I asked Emily if she remembered what MiMo Moby said back in Meekatharra many moons ago; about a Great Dame of Oz at the end of the dust sandy path who could reunite me with Green once again.

Emily said she did remember, and knew exactly what MiMo had meant; she would take us to meet the Dame straight away.

Sir Les Patterson

It wasn’t far away; just a couple of blocks to a big mansion in the centre of Emerald. Emily knocked on the door with one of her corks. It wasn’t long before a large grumpy man answered it.

He bellowed, ‘What do you want?’ at us in a rude manner.

‘Ah, hello,’ said Emily, ‘MiMo Moby told this werewolf friend of mine that the Great Dame of Oz should be able to help it. Is she here?’

The man did not seem impressed, but said he’d see if she was around.

The Great Dame of Oz

A woman arrived a few minutes later; she looked like she could be the sister of the man… or even the same person!

English: Dame Edna statue, Docklands (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

‘Hello possums,’ she said, ‘what can I do for you?’

I told her about my conversation with MiMo Moby, and said we were all still quite lost, despite learning a lot on our epic Ozyssey.

She said she’d love to help, and used to do such things, but she was too busy now that she’d become an international giga-star.

Body, Mind and Spirit Work Together Again

I looked at my travel companions; they seemed to share my disappointment. I wondered if my epic ramble had reached an anti-climactic dead-end, and I would never see Green and the Greenygrey world again.

I was about to suggest leaving, when Cathy spoke up in a spirited way, telling the Dame that that was no way to talk to us. Angry seemed to have been thinking about it as well, because he soon added, ‘You’re not even really the Dame, you were a rude man when you answered the door just now.’ Then Elle used her body to great effect by slamming the door shut.

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Notes

Sir Les Patterson and Dame Edna Everage are Barry Humphries’s comedy characters.

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Australia Win Boomerang Ashes B4 Werewolf of Oz

As 2014 gets well under way you would be forgiven for forgetting all about the serialisation of what we think was 2013’s greatest satirical comedy werewolf travel quest across Australia serial: our very own Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps (please look up ‘satire’ if you were offended by that!).

Ashes Over, Endeavour Everest Back for More 

First of all we’d like to congratulate the Aussie cricket team for winning the Ashes series 5-0. The England and Wales team had won it three times in a row, so it was becoming a bit boring. Hopefully E&W will bounce back next series.

As the E&W Ashes win in Australia during 2010/11 is remembered in the Greenygrey world as the WoO series, as it took place when Grey was on its epic Ozyssey, this series will be remembered as the Boomerang Ashes, after the Aussies returned to form with their oldest secret weapon. 

In the accompanying photo, Aussie series hero, Mitchell Johnson, is celebrating the Ashes win with the first recorded cricketing upside-down boomerang. The first photo showed Johnson in the more conventional boomerang pose.

The above was inspired by the 1932/33 Ashes being remembered as the Bodyline Ashes, because of the number of bouncers bowled by the Aussies.

Secondly, good news if you missed the third Endeavour: Everest  episode featured on this blog last week, with a balloon ride over Everest from base camp at Gokyo, because it is back on the BBC iplayer until January 14th (only available in U.K. as far as we know).

Wizard of Oz and Alice in Wonderland 

Presbyterian Church at Springsure, Queensland. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This episode of the Werewolf of Oz, the fifth from last, combines the two biggest influences on the book, Wizard of Oz and Alice in Wonderland, with the real Australian towns of Oakey, Dalby, Roma, Orion and Springsure between Brisbane and Emerald.

On the way, there is an emotional return to Chinchilla. Enjoy!

138.  Following the Dust Sandy Path to Emerald  

English: Dalby Regional Council customer service centre at Chinchilla, Queensland, formerly the Chinchilla Shire Council offices (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There was a succulent start to the journey, orienteering through an okay oak forest outside Oakey before devouring a delicious dal dinner in Dalby.

Chinchilla is a Killer… Emotionally

It was Chinchilla next, and I prepared myself for an emotional return. I was not disappointed, with chinchillas lining the streets of Chinchilla as we passed. I saw an old chinchilla rush out of the crowd and hug a COG member. When the COG soldier turned around I was delighted to see the name Cilla Chinchilla on her jacket.

Cilla had survived
and achieved her task.
Now I hoped
she’d have time to bask.

Roma, Orion and Spring 

Australiana: a cork hat on a sixpack of VB (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

We roamed through Roma, before it turned dark over Orion; which was good timing, as there was a belting night sky there. Then it seemed like it was spring for sure in Springsure, as everything was green. It became evermore evergreen as we neared Emerald.

I asked Emily how everything was so green, and she said these were the Alician Fields. They are a natural wonderland for those who have turned the world upside down to improve it before returning it the right way up; where sparkling spring water irrigates the earth from underground, and the sun always shines above.

Elysian Fields by Carlos Schwabe, 1903 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I thought nothing could equal the Alician Fields, but Emerald sparkled like the finest precious stone; the town and fields complemented each other like a jewel on silk.

Hats filled the air when Brian and Emily reached Emerald, and our leaders soon joined in with the hatrobatics.

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Notes

The Elysian Fields of Greek mythology were a heavenly paradise for heroic warriors.
Oakey, Dalby, Roma, Orion and Springsure are real places.

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Ashes Nears End, Werewolf of Oz Round the Bend

The Ashes 2013/14 series has reached its final destination, and it will soon be time for the England and Wales cricket team to say their farewells and head home. The Werewolf of Ozzers are also reaching that point in our serialisation of their epic virtual travel quest to all regions of what is known as Australia in the human world.

Sydney Memories Emerald Future 

Australia are in control of the fifth Ashes test in Sydney, while poetry seemed to take control of the Werewolf of Ozzers in Sydney, with Bronte and Greycliffe House inspiring some literary nonsense sublime rhymes.

Emerald Railway Station (Wikipedia)

This episode has final farewells to the friends made along the Oz way, before Emily the Emerald Cork Hat returns those that remain to the book’s Wizard of Oz-inspired final destination: as the Wizard of Ozzers reached their final destination in the Emerald City, the Werewolf of Ozzers end up in the real Australian town of Emerald.

Chapter 137.  Saying Goodbye, and Finding a New Path

After everybody and everything had their bellies full of buns, Emily and Brian addressed us all; it was nice of them to give us a house.

The Ashes Urn (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

They also said the locality would now be known as Brisbane, and the region would be called Queensland; in memory of those who had taken part in the battle. They ended by thanking us for freeing Brian from his bane.

The Army Disperses

It was then time to say goodbye to my old friends and comrades, as they departed for home. Captain Dec and Dai were taking Dig, Aus, Vombat and the Collies back to Western Australia, and the cetaceans were swimming that way too. There were of course lots of hugs, and that’s all I’m prepared to write here.

Land of Oz (Photo credit: _rockinfree)

After they left, Emily asked us what we were doing next. I had seen the dust sandy path leading inland, but told Emily I didn’t know if we were still meant to follow it, now that she and Brian were reunited.

Emily said it looked like the dust sandy path was heading their way… to Emerald.
She invited us along,
and it felt right to go,
for in her I could see a glow;
she hadn’t been wrong yet!

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New Year’s Eve Werewolf of Oz Celebrations

It’s New Year’s Eve, and we can’t think of a better way to celebrate 2013 and look forward to 2014 than with another thrilling episode of Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps.

Remembering the Passing of Time 

Sydney. Fireworks Newyear 2006. Opera House and Harbour. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yes, 2013 has been the year of the WoO in the Greenygrey world, and this episode is quite appropriate for celebrating the New Year, as food and merriment inspires Grey to remember his Ozyssey all the way back to its start in Western Australia.

This blog will be posted in time for the first New Year celebrations, with New Zealand and surrounding islands’ entry into 2014 less than two hours away. The new year will then travel across Australia from east to west; the opposite way to that travelled by Grey in its epic virtual travel quest.

Thanks for your visits in 2013 from all of Team GG. Have a Happy New Year, and good luck for 2014.

Chapter 136.  Searching for Survivors after Battle of Bri’s Bane

I rose into a mix of joy and relief; sadness and loss. Many had given their lives on Greenslopes. I was relieved that Angry, Cathy and Elle quickly joined me, and to see they were all in good health.

Aussie and Digger soon turned up as well, and were looking swell; Aus said it only received a flesh wound. Then Vombat the Wombat pushed its way through the crowd, with a relieved look on its face.

English: Two Border Collies. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I could see Brian and Emily with the chinchilla survivors, but where were the Collie twins?

Searching for the Collie Twins

I asked the others if they’d seen the Collies. Digger said they’d been fighting heroically the last time it’d seen them, which was near the end of the battle. None of them had seen the Collies at the end of the battle. I started walking down the hill, looking through the bodies, dreading finding the Collies in a bad state.

A cascade of cheers rolled down from the top of the hill. I looked behind me and was filled with relief: the Collie twins were alive and well, and being carried along by a crowd of chinchillas. I rushed up the hill to them, and saw they were all eating buns.

English: Bunbury, Western Australia (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I made my way through the munching mass, and asked the twins where they’d been.

Ollie was too busy bun-munching above the bunch to hear; but Colin said that after the fighting finished they noticed a rich bun seam had been exposed by all the disruption, so they’d straightaway started bun-mining to feed the hungry survivors. He handed me a freshly mined rough-cut bun.

I laughed and thanked him, before biting into a bun that tasted just as delicious as those I’d eaten in Bunbury.

As I savoured the taste, and memories of Ozyssey evoked, I thought how Bunbury and Bri’s bane were on different sides of Oz, but would be quite close together in a dictionary. I thought there must be a lesson there somewhere, but was too busy bun-munching to brainwave.

Australia Win 4th Ashes Test in Gillian Taylforth

We hope you had a merry Crimbo, and congratulations to Australia for winning the fourth Ashes test in Melbourne. You may remember that the Werewolf of Ozzers thought it was called Gillian Taylforth, until great teamwork by the body, spirit and mind found its real name and worked out it wasn’t named after Mel Gibson.

Werewolf of Oz Memories 

Holly Valance 1800 Reverse Yoga TVC (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This allowed the WoOs to tuck into some scrumptious Holly Valance bubble and squeak before they entered the weird time-travel rock town of Kerang-Kerrang. Bonzo decided to stay, and didn’t return for the Battle of Bri’s bane.

Many of the old characters from the trip did return though, and they have not finished their contribution to the tale yet. Today, we have the last part of the epic battle trilogy, with seven exciting chapters of comedy fantasy still to go after that.

Chapter 135.  The Aftermath

Battle of Bri’s Bane Epic Trilogy Poem 3

I lay on the Greenslopes ground
watched by allies all around
Bri’s bane was no more
the acid rain cleansed from floor.

‘We knew not a wolf you would become,’
said Emily’s voice betraying concern,
‘for the bane was not only of Brian’s
but also of wolves and lions.’

‘So wolfsbane is inside you now
but maybe we can work out how
to make you healthy again
I’ll try counting to ten.’

Emily counted to eight
my mood improved to third-rate
on nine I sensed the right line
hearing ten I was fine.

I rose to join the others
my sisters and brothers
in arms and hats we had battled
and Bri’s Bane together tackled.

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Soap Opera Style Christmas Cracker but not Like U.K. Rain Storm

It’s Christmas Eve Eve, and our last post before Christmas. There’s no better way we can think of spending Christmas than with the second thrilling part of the Werewolf of Oz‘s Battle of Bri’s bane epic war poem trilogy.

Christmas Wishes

Hi, it’s Greenygrey, with the first episode of the week of our comedy fantasy classic Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps, available for just one £5 Amazon voucher or the equivalent in worldwide (human) currencies.

We hope you all have a great Christmas and holidays!

Battle of Bri’s bane Soap Opera Style 

bri (Photo credit: sethoscope)

As British soap operas build up their storylines towards the big Christmas episodes ratings war, the Battle of Bri’s bane epic trilogy poem reaches its peak in this second part.

There’s still lots more thrilling and funny fun ahead, so please don’t think this is the end of the end; or the beginning of the end; more like the middle of the end.

Topical Stuff

As heavy rain hits Britain, it is also quite topical in that part of the human world. Thankfully, it’s just normal rain falling on the U.K.: not acid rain! 

Brian and Kevin (Photo credit: Tim Patterson)

Australia has not yet renamed Brisbane to Kevsbane, but this accompanying photo shows what the change might mean to its visual appearance.

Chapter 134.  Will a Hat-trick be Enough for Rain

Battle of Bri’s Bane Epic Trilogy Poem 2

The COG commandos lost legions
fur and skin torn to lesions
rolling back down the slope in heroic death
Chinchillas of Goya drawing their last breath.

I reached the top after an hour of struggle
and saw Bri’s bane officers in a huddle
Emily and Brian were flying a pincer attack
Emerald from the front, Baggy from back.

My travel companions and I rushed to help
an arrow glanced Aussie and it gave out a yelp
we continued on through a battlefield royal
the chinchillas and allies staying loyal.

As Brian and Emily approached Bri’s bane
the huddle suddenly opened into acid rain
seeming to scent Brian it turned sharply
and flew screeching like a demented harpy.

I shapeshifted into a wolf and raced to Brian
distracting Bri’s bane rain as Emily leapt like a lion
Brian jumped for joy as the hats converged
soaking up the acid rain until it was purged.

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Notes

The harpy was a winged spirit in Greek mythology.

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Graeme Swann Oz Swansong Shock Announcement

As we once again near the end of Werewolf of Oz: Fantasy Travel by Google Maps, which took over two years of virtual travelling, the England and Wales Ashes tour of Oztralia has claimed its second casualty. Graeme Swann has announced his retirement from cricket.

Graeme Swann Swansong 

English: Graham Swann at Lord’s Cricket Ground 20th July 2009 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hi, it’s Martin ‘Werewolfie’ Adams, satirical comedy sports correspondent at the Greenygrey.

Unfortunately Graeme Swann has announced his immediate retirement from all forms of cricket.

Swann is getting on in cricketing age, and has been out of form on the England and Wales Ashes tour, which the Aussies lead 3-0 (just realised that now won makes a nice palindrome… before then realising it was a mistake… but didn’t want to waste it!).

Swann becomes the second travelling casualty of the Ashes tour, after Jonathon Trott returned home due to mental health issues.

Werewolf of Oz Swan Lake Tragedy 

Swan Lake (Photo credit: Cindy Andrie)

Swann’s retirement is poignant for the Greenygrey, after the Werewolf of Oz featured a Swan Lake tragedy, with the loss of Kalbarri Barry and family in Swan Lake, N.S.W.

The 5th Ashes test will be in N.S.W., but before that, there’s the 4th test in Melbourne, Victoria.

 

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Epic Poem Trilogy 1: Battle of Bri’s Bane Beginning

Nearly two years and 132 (short) chapters/episodes after Grey landed on the west coast of Oz all alone it finds itself in the middle of the east coast, where Brisbane in Australia is in the human world.

Hope and Glory 

bri (Photo credit: sethoscope)

After dozens of adventures and escapades it finds itself only ten chapters from the end, but it’s looking up at the full force of Bri’s bane.

However, there is hope, as it is part of the Hats of Hope army led by Emily the Emerald Cork Hat and Brian the Baggy Green (he’s the one with the bane).

South Park and Simpsons Inspiration 

Towelie from South Park holding a bong. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hi, it’s Greenygrey. While I’ve paid tribute to Monty Python recently, the Hats of Hope reminds me more of South Park, what with its life-giving characterisation of what are normally inanimate objects in the human world: such as Towelie (seen here in a greenygrey pose) and Mr. Hanky.

It also has a Mr. Hat of course, but it is not alive, although Mr. Garrison seems to think it is.

While we really liked South Park’s clever humour, and tried to emulate it, we kept the more personal and cutting edge aspects out of the Werewolf of Oz, and treated the celebrity guests nicer; more like The Simpsons in that regard.

Lord of the Rings and Hobbit Influence 

Anyway, here’s the first part of the Battle of Bri’s Bane poem trilogy, which contains some classic comedy, but is more epic travel quest inspired by Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit.

Bane (Photo credit: ElDave)

I should also mention that Batman: Dark Knight Rises was released during the writing of the book, and also features a Bane, which fitted together with the baggy green hat for the book’s end baddie hat nemesis. That Bane originated in DC Comics, and was played in the movie by Tom Hardy.

Have a serene Winter Solstice in the northern hemisphere, and a wonderful Summer Solstice in the southern hemisphere.

Chapter 133.  Ascending Greenslopes

Battle of Bri’s Bane Epic Trilogy Poem 1

Dead men tell no tales
only the competitive fails
in war there is no sport
to survivors the lesson is taught.

We had not long assembled
before Greenslopes trembled
as balls of fire landed at will
shot from high on Cannon Hill.

Our allies the Woolloongabba
met their Waterloo like Abba
falling in multiple millions
history’s cannon fodder minions.

The COG commandos led the counter-attack
up Greenslopes watching each other’s back
chinchillas, dogs, humans, wombats and hats
above us flew eagles, dolphins and bats.

Yes, I did say dolphins above us
for a spirit appeared without fuss
and I’m sure it was Kalbarri Barry
riding the sky waves with his family.

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Notes

Woolloongabba is a district of Brisbane.
Abba and song: Waterloo.

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